Man Plans to Dump Baby Mama of 4 for Ambitious Colleague, Sparks Outrage Online
A Nigerian man has stirred massive controversy on social media after anonymously revealing plans to end a five-year relationship with his baby mama, despite the couple currently expecting their fourth child. Eyes Of Lagos reports,
In a heartfelt confession posted on a popular platform, the man detailed how he convinced his then-ex to leave her fiancé five years ago with the promise of marriage — a promise he never fulfilled.
🏠 “We Were Never Married – Just Vat and Sit”
According to the man, shortly after securing a job at a local municipality five years ago, he invited his ex and their child to move in with him. Though she was engaged to someone else at the time, he convinced her to leave that relationship under the condition that he would marry her within a year.
“I just wanted us to raise our child together,” he said.
“We’ve had two more kids since then, and she’s now pregnant with our fourth.”
Despite their growing family, he admits they’re still in a “vat and sit” arrangement — a colloquial South African term for cohabiting without legal marriage.
💔 “She’s No Longer Attractive… I’ve Found Someone Better”
Now, the man claims to have fallen out of love with his partner. He expressed that his feelings have faded, and he’s found new affection for a younger, more ambitious, and attractive colleague at his workplace.
“My baby mama lacks ambition… she’s not as attractive as she used to be. My colleague is beautiful, smart, and more my type.”
He goes on to ask the internet whether it would be insensitive to ask his pregnant partner to move out now, or if he should wait until she delivers. He assures that he’ll “take care of the kids.”
🔥 Social Media Reacts: “This Is Cruelty, Not Confusion”
As expected, the story has sparked intense backlash across platforms like X, Instagram, and Facebook:
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@ThatNaijaTherapist: “So you used her womb and loyalty for five years only to toss her out while pregnant? Emotional abuse, period.”
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@linda_loveline: “She gave up everything to build a home with you. And now you want to throw her away because of ‘ambition’ and ‘beauty’? Heartless.”
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@chinedu_thelawyer: “If a woman did this to a man, she’d be branded a gold digger. Double standards everywhere.”
Others, however, pointed out the dangers of staying in loveless relationships:
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@grownmanmatters: “Tough situation, but pretending to love someone is worse. He should provide and co-parent responsibly if he’s truly done emotionally.”
🧠 Experts Weigh In: Duty Before Desire
According to Lagos-based family therapist Dr. Grace Adewunmi, the issue isn’t just about attraction — it’s about emotional responsibility.
“This man made a verbal marriage commitment, welcomed multiple children with her, and emotionally tethered her future to his. To walk away mid-pregnancy because someone ‘new’ looks better is deeply unethical,” she said.
She added that if the relationship is truly over, he should wait until after childbirth, ensure emotional and financial stability for the mother, and seek co-parenting counseling.
📌 Conclusion: A Viral Wake-Up Call About Commitment
This confession isn’t just trending for its shock value — it’s a reflection of growing conversations around cohabitation, broken promises, emotional accountability, and gender dynamics in modern Nigerian relationships.
Should love always be conditional on ambition and appearance? Or does fatherhood and history demand more than feelings?
One thing is clear: the internet isn’t done talking about this one.